I have recognised some of the foods that cause me a lot of problems controlling my weight. Mainly white and processed foods all the simple carbohydrates grains and root vegetables sugar bread potatoes etc. I am well aware that these foods cause major fluid retention and fat storage in my body but for some reason every now and again I have to throw out everything I know and consume these foods, sometimes in large quantities. Am I just checking to see if by some miracle I have been cured and can now eat these foods or am I throwing a tantrum and saying I am going to eat them anyway or am I self sabotaging because I am scared of the new me and the new healthy lifestyle that I am practising that is actually working for the first time in my life, I may even be able to join that exclusive group that are not obese.
I know I like new things and excitement in my life but do I really need to see the scale jump by over 2kg or 5lb overnight and then take over a week to drop back again.
I have no portion control when it comes to these foods especially sugar and if I buy it I will always eat it all in one sitting or I will wear the fridge door out going back and forward until it is all gone. I don't know why I do this I am convinced it is psychological some sort of deprivation issue from my childhood with some physical symptoms thrown in for good measure for example my insulin spiking and creating severe hunger pains or feeling like I have a hangover from sugar overload.
Any sensible person you would think would avoid food that they know makes them feel ill and stacks on the weight just looking at it and for the most part I do, but every now and then the need for comfort or somebody offers food or gives me food that I know I shouldn't eat, I will use all the excuses in the book, I don't want to offend or it doesn't really matter, I will be right I have been so good a little bit won't hurt.
I am here and now recognising that I can't eat these foods at anytime, really they are poison to my system they make me ill, they store in my body as fat and they have been slowly killing me all of my life. They have been my silent enemy its like fighting something that you don't know is there, you can't see it or hear it and you definitely can't hit back. But I know my enemy now the light has been switched on and I can see into all the corners of the room. I have educated myself and experienced the devastation that these foods cause me and my weightloss journey it is time to banish them once and for all. Some people can eat any food as long as they portion control and count calories I can't and I need to accept this as my reality, I have had enough experience over the last 10 months of the problems that these foods cause me.
I think this relates to lots of things in my life and I really need to start protecting myself and saying no to doing things I don't want to do and feeling guilty for being different and to stop hiding behind I am allergic or diabetic. I need to be honest with myself and others and say those foods do not agree with me and I can't eat them and get over the fact that this is the way it is otherwise I will never be truly free to be who I want to be.
Weigh in info I have had a low weight of 138.3kg or 304lb so close to going under 300lb I am looking forward to that day I have set a goal of having lost 30kg or 66lb by New Year very achievable.
Have a great day
Ann
Wednesday, December 23, 2009
Sunday, December 6, 2009
The Milestones and Victories
Its a part of life to celebrate milestones and victories and as a part of the weight loss journey its very important. The celebrations help with motivation and the victories remind you of why you are making weight loss a part of your life.
This week a made a milestone I weighed in at 139.5kg or 307lb this means I have lost over 27kg or 60lb. This is one of the goals I had set so I have achieved that goal. My next goal will be to go under 300lb I don't worry about how long it takes to get there as long as I am always moving in the right direction. Because I have decided I will never see that weight on my scales again this is the last time I am going to do this so it doesn't matter how long it takes, speed is not my priority I want to lose the weight and never see it again. Losing weight quickly has never been successful for me and in the past I have used pills and potions, not this time I have made a plan and I am sticking to it.
I have had a few victories this month, I was able to wear what I call do up pants you might laugh but do ups are serious. I have been wearing pull ups for so long you would think that I was a slow learner in potty training. Doing up a button on pants that I couldn't even get up at the beginning of the year was exciting and worthy of note, I also had a work Christmas dinner to attend and I got a dress out to wear that I had never worn and it was too big, way too big there is no way I could have warn it, so I went down to the these don't fit yet section of the wardrobe (I have always got clothes that I have bought that are too small, always purchased with the idea that I will lose weight)and found a dress I thought I would try, put it on and it was a little bit tight but I could get away with it. When I arrived at the dinner I was greeted with heaps of compliments and soaked it up and had a great time.
You really have to celebrate these victories and use them as motivation to keep going on the journey to be healthier. I am back swimming nearly everyday and the pleasure and confidence I get from being able to swim that bit further or that bit faster makes my day. Exercise makes you feel so much better life is hard and you add on trying to lose weight you need all the help you can get, regular exercise makes you feel in control and powerful and it gives you plenty of encouragement by showing you how much your body has improved on a regular basis.
This journey is long and difficult I found the best way to keep continuing is to have realistic goals celebrate the victories and give the people around you an opportunity to help and support you. Small goals add up I was very daunted by what I needed to lose to get to my goal weight so I have broken it down into 5 kilo or 10lb goals I don't look at the end I just look at the next 5 kilo's that I have to lose and if it takes me a month or two months it doesn't matter, as long as I am focused on reaching the next milestone.
The New Year will be here soon and I know its going to be a really great one full of milestones and victories to celebrate and lots of support from my friends. I am really confident that I am on the right track now and this year has taught me a great deal about myself and about what I want and need and what I have to do to get what I want.
There is only one real answer eat well and exercise, now that I have found the answer the sky is the limit.
Merry Christmas and Happy New Year
Ann
This week a made a milestone I weighed in at 139.5kg or 307lb this means I have lost over 27kg or 60lb. This is one of the goals I had set so I have achieved that goal. My next goal will be to go under 300lb I don't worry about how long it takes to get there as long as I am always moving in the right direction. Because I have decided I will never see that weight on my scales again this is the last time I am going to do this so it doesn't matter how long it takes, speed is not my priority I want to lose the weight and never see it again. Losing weight quickly has never been successful for me and in the past I have used pills and potions, not this time I have made a plan and I am sticking to it.
I have had a few victories this month, I was able to wear what I call do up pants you might laugh but do ups are serious. I have been wearing pull ups for so long you would think that I was a slow learner in potty training. Doing up a button on pants that I couldn't even get up at the beginning of the year was exciting and worthy of note, I also had a work Christmas dinner to attend and I got a dress out to wear that I had never worn and it was too big, way too big there is no way I could have warn it, so I went down to the these don't fit yet section of the wardrobe (I have always got clothes that I have bought that are too small, always purchased with the idea that I will lose weight)and found a dress I thought I would try, put it on and it was a little bit tight but I could get away with it. When I arrived at the dinner I was greeted with heaps of compliments and soaked it up and had a great time.
You really have to celebrate these victories and use them as motivation to keep going on the journey to be healthier. I am back swimming nearly everyday and the pleasure and confidence I get from being able to swim that bit further or that bit faster makes my day. Exercise makes you feel so much better life is hard and you add on trying to lose weight you need all the help you can get, regular exercise makes you feel in control and powerful and it gives you plenty of encouragement by showing you how much your body has improved on a regular basis.
This journey is long and difficult I found the best way to keep continuing is to have realistic goals celebrate the victories and give the people around you an opportunity to help and support you. Small goals add up I was very daunted by what I needed to lose to get to my goal weight so I have broken it down into 5 kilo or 10lb goals I don't look at the end I just look at the next 5 kilo's that I have to lose and if it takes me a month or two months it doesn't matter, as long as I am focused on reaching the next milestone.
The New Year will be here soon and I know its going to be a really great one full of milestones and victories to celebrate and lots of support from my friends. I am really confident that I am on the right track now and this year has taught me a great deal about myself and about what I want and need and what I have to do to get what I want.
There is only one real answer eat well and exercise, now that I have found the answer the sky is the limit.
Merry Christmas and Happy New Year
Ann
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